Stress Relief Blog

I was in Montreal visiting my wife’s 82 year old auntie, just a few days ago. Usually the conversation is fun and light hearted like chats with friends. But this time Auntie said something that stopped me iced-cool in my thinking.

And you know something you’re right but what do your friends and family think. You may be very surprise.

Sometimes it is very difficult for us to see the forest from the trees. However, there is another tell tale sign.

Do you ever recall saying – when you have enough money you will go on holiday or take a weekend trip with your family. But you never seem to have time because you are so busy making money.

In fact, you only take the time to stop when you are forced to stop because of a health challenge.

This making more money syndrome can become very addictive. And like most addicts we seem to live in denial.

Now this behaviour work, eat, pay bills and drink can result in stress and anxiety, short temper, high blood pressure, lack of sleep and other health challenges.

This behaviour can also come with a cost. Every time you blow up and or lose your temper, it will cost you in an apology or a gift to make up for your guilt.

Now here’s the secret to success to overcoming panic attacks:

You have all this raw drive and energy which is not properly channelled.

So what would happen if you focused on enjoying a balanced life while chasing your dream – Instead of achieving material success at the expense of your health?

There is not only hope but a definite course of action you can take to break this pattern of behaviour.

Just imagine for a moment what your dream would be look like if you were really dealing with stress naturally.

How would your relationship with your partner change?

What would happen when you are no longer quickly losing your temper?

Consider the implication of your statement: You’ll take a weekend trip with your family when you have enough money.

How does that make you feel?

No matter how long you have been in business, you will need a skill or technique to help you overcome panic attacks. The good news: You only need to stop and use ONE of the suggestions I have outlined to change your behaviour. It’s that simple to bring back fun into your life again.

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If you have attended personal development seminars, you’ve probably been encouraged to deal with negative thoughts by posting lots of positive affirmations on your walls, refrigerator and your bulletin boards.

Well, here the thing and I don’t mean to shock you. Negative thoughts are in fact good. They are necessary in providing the fodder to eliminate spikes in your anxiety and in raising your high blood pressure.

But Cecil, you got to be kidding! If I would constantly consider negative thoughts, then won’t I actually manifest bad thing in my life?

Yeah, that’s probable.

But after spending over 14 years working with info marketers, solo professionals, entrepreneurs, and coaches just like you I have discovered that following  a simple road map, negative thinking  can create more success and happiness in your life than the failure you expected.

 Let me explain this statement.

 Every negative thought has a positive surface. So if you put positive affirmations on your walls, how is that going change your negative thoughts?

I guess if you have a lot of spare time and you tend to work with affirmations, that would be okay

But the people that I have worked with came to perceive this us fallacious because they did not have the time to wait for some time to see the actual result.

So what shall you do?

Let say, your negative thought is about money. Here is your opportunity to have as much abundance as you desire.

The trick is to focus on what you want and not on the negative thing.

The problem is that, generally, you get so focused on that negative thought that you came to forget to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Now I can imagine that if you have more than one negative thought running in your head at the same time, then you’re possibly doomed for failure.

You need to have a purpose in life.

You can aspire immensely, becoming independently wealthy for example. But in order to achieve that big goal, you need to be able to deal with your daily stress challenges.

This is where your small purpose comes in. You need to keep an eye on your daily tasks, their completion rather than the distraction.

If you dug up your sight out of completion and focus on the distractions, that would be the chance that your negative thoughts will take over you life.

I am all for positive thinking. It great! Inspiring! It’s a good feeling!

But from my experience, If I am lulled into a false sense of security and ignore the booby trap to eliminate spikes in my anxiety and in raising my high blood pressure, I am actually inviting the disaster that I want to be hindered in respect for my positive thoughts.

By taking some time to consider the unthinkable, you will be prepared enough to trail on your challenging journey. You would have a better health and you would be ready to respond promptly to whatever situation you may encounter.

Cecil McIntosh guides solo-preneurs and entrepreneurs worldwide to manage feeling overwhelmed and the relaxation secret. Get a jump start on your own relax and stress less system with 21 no-brainer shortcut to achieving health and happiness at http://eycfreebook.com You can reach Cecil at http://www.cecilhelpdesk.com

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If you are a stressed-out entrepreneur or solopreneur, one of the questions that can drive you bonkers is “how can I relax and let go if I have never done it before?”It even saddens me when the answers that all my friends give me make me feel even more overwhelmed.

We’ll take a deep sigh of relief because I am going to reveal the secret that will tend to solve this agonizing question once and forever.

It doesn’t even involve going through mountains or some exotic places for a holiday.

Here’s the thing:

Everybody knows how to relax. You may relax by having a cup of coffee or a smoke.

The problem here is that when you really need to relax, your form of relaxation may seem inappropriate or impractical.

Let’s say you’re driving home after a hard day of work and someone cuts you off.

How can you empty your cup, relax and let go?

Oh! Where can you find that coffee and/or piece of cigar when you desperately need it?

So what shall you do to solve this dilemma?

Now you know you need to use your mind and stop using temporary remedies, coffee for an instance, because you have done it before.

Because of the hustles and bustles of living and fighting with daily stresses, you really have no time to make use of your mind to relax.

So here is what you need to do.

In your mind, you need to picture what unwinding really is when you relax and let go. When you get in touch with such experience, you then discern what it feels like to be relaxing.

Take another deep breath.

It’s really important that you get to absorb this.

Having a coffee or smoke is not the actual solution for your desire to learn to relax and let go. After all, if learning to relax is so stressful, why do it at all?

Simply follow the steps above and you will get to feel relieved out of stress and eventually take the pleasure of relaxation.

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So you have decided to learn to relax?

How do I know how to get above the noise?
How do I make it work if I am busy?
How can I slow down and be more productive?

These were the important questions every beginner ask themselves.

The good news is, you can save months of trial and error and thousands of dollars simply by following these three crucial starter points.

How do I know how to get above the noise?

Generally speaking we want to avoid noise in times that we want to be quiet and be just by ourselves. Trying to avoid noise is like attempting to stop breathing. Wherever you go, nuisance will be there.

What do you do to embrace those noises around you?

In your mind’s eye you can set those noises as the sound of waves of the sea. This would put you in a very relaxing state as you assimilate how easy it is to accept noises.

How do I make it work if I am busy?

This is a good question because people always tend to be busy. Here’s what you should do.

Just imagine what your busy life would be like 3 months from today when you have learned how to embrace the noises around so that you can find clarity of purpose.

How can I slow down and be more productive?

Productivity is based on many factors. In our case, productivity is based on discipline and clarity of purpose.

Discipline, in the sense that you opt to stay with the task at hand and not get drawn all, over the place or attempt yourself to put out every fire. You must inevitably determine which tasks are necessary to prioritize.

Secondly, allot sometime in the day for the unexpected. Too tight a schedule can actually create distractions and made you less productive. This brings us to clarity of purpose.

Clarity of purpose: As you practice embracing the noises around you and tend to imagine yourself relaxed, you will then have a lot of clarity unto yourself.

The thing you will notice about clarity is that you will become a better listener because you have embraced all those noises.

This will allow you to take notice of the information or messages that are coming to you. This is very important because you would not normally hear or receive this information over loud noises.

The interesting thing about starting any enterprise is the marvellous energy and exuberance you have. The challenge is, without proper direction you can waste this valuable resource leaving feeling frustrated and overwhelmed with nothing to show for your effort.

Be sure to follow the crucial beginner’s tips that I have outlined. Through these points, you could be at speed up the rate at which you attain your success. And this would definitely amaze you!

Cecil McIntosh guides solo-preneurs and entrepreneurs worldwide to manage feeling overwhelmed and stress relief management. Get a jump start on your own relax and stress less system with 21 no-brainer shortcut to achieving health and happiness at http://eycfreebook.com You can reach Cecil at http://www.cecilhelpdesk.com

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In my over 14 years of working with stressed out entrepreneurs, I am astonished at just how many of them believe that it is OK to be successful and acquire material assets but yet, be unhappy because they are not satisfied doing what they do.

Well, let me tell you: there is nothing that can be farther from the truth.

It tears my heart apart, but most people are unfortunately headed for disaster. And what’s worse, it doesn’t really have to happen.

If you would like to change this misfortune in your thinking (and I realize you do!) here are the 4 most catastrophic mistakes about being unhappy with yourself and how you can avoid them.

Mistake #1: Focus

In life you need to have a focus. Sometimes your focus is determined for you by your parents and loved ones. Whether you’re successful or not is not the point of discussion. The point is, are you happy?
Generally the answer is no, because we have been taught that we have to please others first.
In order to focus, you need to relax. As you start practicing relaxation on a regular basis, you will get more clarity.

Mistake #2: Clarity

So what is clarity?

Let’s say you have all these roads in life and you come to a fork in the road where you have to decide which way to go.
What do you do?

Please remember this: You have no one to give you advice because you are all on your own. This is where your daily relaxation practice comes in handy. You can go inside yourself and find the answer to make your decision.

Now that you understand what clarity is all about, what is the next mistake?

Mistake #3: Purpose

So what is your purpose?

Let’s take a simple example: When you go shopping for groceries, do you take a list and a pen or pencil?

Three possibilities:

1. If you don’t make a list of groceries, you are going to buy items you don’t need and you will probably forget other items that are necessary.
2. If you take a list and no pencil to mark off what you purchased, you may still forget some items although they are on the list.
3. You make your list and you mark off your purchases. You check out and you go home

Now that is focus and a lot less stress

Mistake #4: Listening

What is listening?

A good example is, when you and your partner are like two tape recorders and both of you are speaking at the same time and therefore, nobody is listening.

The challenge is that most people have a “full cup” and they want to empty that cup. It is like wanting to go to the wash room when you can’t hold it any longer.

In order to listen, you need to quite the mind and shut out the inner chatter and outer noises and focus on what you hear so you can understand and appreciate them.

What so important about this information is that it can get you going on your way to success or resurrect an old idea you might have abandoned and inject it with desire and hope.

Cecil McIntosh guides solo-preneurs and entrepreneurs worldwide to manage feeling overwhelmed and to feel happy about yourself again. Get a jump start on your own relax and stress less system with 21 no-brainer shortcut to achieving health and happiness at http://eycfreebook.com You can reach Cecil at http://www.cecilhelpdesk.com

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One of the most popular ways to relax and stress less in your relationship is to pretend that everything is OK.

The three techniques are active listening skills, being in the moment and accepting your partner unconditionally.

1. Active Listening skills

The stress from lack of communication can cause your stress and anxiety to spike daily. Consequently you may drink or smoke or have an affair hoping to get caught, as a way of getting attention.

You also may not have the tools to deal with the emotional sting in your relationship which can lead to life style change and better health.

In order to be able to listen to your partner, you must be able to hear when they speak to you. In order to hear you need to clear your mind.

This can be achieved by learning how to relax. Everybody has his way of relaxing but how come there is still so much stress?

Your relaxation method has to be practical for it to be effective. Let’s say you relax by flying a plane. When you start to talk to your partner, how can you get the feeling of the plane into the conversation?

You get my point.

2. Being in the moment

You may wonder if it is possible to relax and be in the moment with all the noises that you are experiencing all day long. First you need to have a goal to have more clarity of purpose.

Your mind is much more powerful than you think. For example, where you are right now is the sum total of your thoughts.

So focus on what you want instead of what you do not want. Initially, it is difficult because you will notice a lot of your negative thoughts. But as you continue you will get better at being aware of your negative thinking.

3. Accepting your partner unconditionally

This may sound like a big task but is very simple. When you met someone, there was an attraction that created the connection.

So you focused on that one piece that ignited the relationship. But what do you, do with all the other pieces.

Do you throw them away?

Oh no!

The challenge is to decide which four elements are those that your partner must have, in order for you to even consider a relationship.

Relationships require more thoughts before you become committed. Now when you have the four elements, they become your foundation for a relationship.

Now that you have that foundation in your relationship, you can consider accepting your partner unconditionally because you are getting something in return.

What is so exciting about these new perspectives, is that they can jump start you to the road of relationship success, or revive a flagging effort you may have abandoned, and inject you with new hope and energy.

Cecil McIntosh guides solo-preneurs and entrepreneurs worldwide to manage feeling overwhelmed and enjoy better relationships. Get a jump start on your own relax and stress less system with 21 no-brainer shortcut to achieving your dream of health and happiness at http://eycfreebook.com You can reach Cecil at http://www.cecilhelpdesk.com

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You can actually cut feeling overwhelmed by 50%.

The Empty Your Cup® (E.Y.C®) Principles help you to get twice as much done with 50% less effort.

Why is this important?
Why will this improve my health?
Why do I need to explore the (E.Y.C®) Principles?

Here’s something you probably don’t know.

50 million Americans have high blood pressure.

35% don’t even know it.

How’s that possible? You see, we have been taught to acquire material assets at the expense of our health.

Let’s see how you can have all of those material assets without sacrificing your values.

EYC™ Principles

What is the (E.Y.C®) Process or what are the (E.Y.C®) principles? Before I explain the (E.Y.C®) principles I need to explain the foundation of the (E.Y.C®) Process.

The (E.Y.C®) Process acknowledges that the Western form of thinking is to acquire material wealth at any cost. The Eastern philosophy is to get to know you. Inner strength is what counts.

So here’s what I have done in the (E.Y.C®) foundation: I have blended the Eastern and Western philosophies so that you now have balance. You have the desire for material wealth balanced with inner strength.

So you may ask: Cecil how do you do that?

I do that based on…

The tenets and principles of (E.Y.C®) – Faith, Trust, and Truth.

The first principle is FAITH. Faith means that you got to believe in something. Faith, is not knowing in a traditional (logical) way.

=> It’s a “knowing” that has become habitual. Therefore you know that you know but you cannot explain why or how – just blind faith. To live like this is critical.

The next tenet is TRUST.

You can understand trust better as ‘to take action’. You get an idea and it is important to act on the idea.

=> But here’s a problem…

I am not referring to impulsive behavior which means that you just charge you credit card on a whim.

Let’s switch gears for a moment back to faith. Faith is based on a feeling, sound, a picture, smell or a taste – sensory input.

These states of mind, whether conscious or unconscious, are what cause us to know. This behavior if acted upon regularly becomes a habit.

=>Now get this:

Trust is when you act on the “knowing” of faith” You do not think about it or second guess it. You act upon the thought immediately, and when you do, you arrive at the TRUTH.

So what is the TRUTH?

To act upon the thought immediately, and when you do that you arrive at the TRUTH.

=>But first a warning:

Now there’s, => my truth, =>your truth and=> the truth. So that’s the basic of the principles.

=>OK, so I am not clear enough for you?

But better yet… Let me give you an example:

When teaching my advanced students I would decide whether I am having a seminar or workshop. The students were not given any info regarding content or title and they did not ask any questions. That’s an example of FAITH.

TRUST came about when they took action and paid for the seminar or workshop.

The TRUTH was that the students got the purest content from me because nothing was prepared in a logical manner in advance.

Now it’s your turn to take action:

Are you getting message (Faith) and not taking action (trust)? How can you arrive at THE truth that you are spinning your wheels?

I am challenging you to stop feeling overwhelmed, have more focus or easily cope with stress, by taking action the next time you get that message or insight. No need to ask question. Just do it.

We would really appreciate you feedback in the comments below. Peace.

Cecil McIntosh guides solo-preneurs and entrepreneurs worldwide to manage feeling overwhelmed and avoid work place stress. Get a jump start on your own relax and stress less system with 21 no-brainer shortcut to achieving health and happiness at http://eycfreebook.com You can reach Cecil at http://www.cecilhelpdesk.com

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In my 14 years of working with stressed out entrepreneurs, I have been surprised at just how many of them have the idea that they need to work harder and be financially independent before they can find time to relax.

Well, after working in a hospital with heart and stroke patients, I am here to tell you that this is all one big myth.

It makes me feel sad, but most of these wonderful people are obviously headed for a major catastrophe. And here’s the thing, there is no need for it to happen to you.

If you would like to stave off their doom (and I realize you do!), here are 4 spectacularly simple ways to dodge this health challenge.

Tip #1: All work and no play make Jack a dull boy.

Nobody likes a dull boy and nobody likes to work all the time, but sometimes we get tunnel vision and forget the health consequences.

In life there needs to be a balance between work and your personal life. If your personal life is not in order, then you will take that additional stress to work. So in order to have less stress at work, you need to find ways to play when you leave work.

You may decide to learn to separate your work from your home life so that you can enjoy your family and friends after work and this would be a very important first step.  

Tip #2: Too much of anything is not good.

If you went to the buffet table and ate too much, you’ll soon feel uncomfortable and you would no longer be able to enjoy the evening.

Likewise if all you do is work, you will come home exhausted. If you are in a relationship, who wants a partner who is always tired?

You may be in denial about your addiction to work but how do you deal with the stress of an unhappy partner?

Tip #3: What do you think about your health?

One of the problems about our health is that we take it for granted. If you take your car for granted and do not take it in for proper maintenance, then it will break down and you may have to call the tow truck.

Similarly, if you do not believe that you should have your annual check up, when your body breaks down because of lack of stress control, then you call 911.

Tip #4: Did you know that pain is good?

Your body is a beautiful instrument. One of the things your body does is, it gives you a lot of information. This information comes in the form of pain for us to protect our health. But here’s the thing: We don’t know that pain is good, so we treat pain as an enemy rather than a friend. We want to get rid of it because we feel it’s bad.

Pain is merely a message like the knocking in your car, telling you that you need to make some small correction, to bring your body back into balance.

What is so breathtaking about these thoughts is, it can trigger you back to the way of achieving greater success, or quicken a tired effort you may have deserted, and inject it with new hope and energy.

We appreciate you feedback. Comment below and tell us what you think. Peace

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Over the past 14 years working with stressed out solopreneurs, I have always been shocked at how many of them believe that in order to relax they have to work harder.

3. You are what you eat

It is very difficult to drive your car without gas or fuel. Likewise it is very difficult for you to function if there is not enough fuel in your body.

So you need to eat properly, meaning, having three proper meals a day. These meals need to be balanced with all the proper food that contain the essential vitamins and nutrients that your body needs. Avoid binging on fast food entrees that have high salt and fat content.

Start by having a healthy breakfast every day.

4. Manage your caffeine fixation

Do you find yourself needing a caffeine fix to get through the day?

A cup of coffee is good but if you’re not careful you may sooner or later find yourself needing several jolts of caffeine just to make it through the day.

Remember, the more coffee you take, the more coffee you need. And that’s not a good thing.

So coffee is only a temporary fix and there are other natural ways to boost your energy without caffeine.

No matter how long you have been in business, chances are you are missing one of the four key steps to stay stress-free. So try and follow the steps to make sure that you can work hard but not suffer hard.

Cecil McIntosh guides solopreneurs worldwide to manage feeling overwhelmed and avoid work place stress. Get a jump start on your own relax and stress less system with 21 no-brainer shortcut to achieving health and happiness at http://eycfreebook.com You can reach Cecil at cecil.mcintosh@gmail.com 

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Listen to a Mother’s day song and tell what you think of the questions below.

1. What memories did the song evoke?
2. How do you feel after listening to the song?
3. What lessons did you learn?

Share your thoughts. We’ll love to have your feedback.

Cecil McIntosh, Empty Your Cup Relaxation Coach converting fear and anger into peace and power. How  are  you dealing with the stress of being angry at Mom? Claim your copy of 21 way to reduce stress on Mother’s day. He is also the creator of the Empty Your Cup Process™. Cecil is also a Healer, gifted Teacher, Therapist, NLP Trainer and life Coach. You can reach Cecil at cecil.mcintosh@gmail.com

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